brave:

I CAME IN LIKE A SHREKING BALL

image

(Source: loserslol, via ruinedchildhood)

  • Mother: *sings along to the radio* Who dat who dat? I-g-g-y~
  • Baby: b...b-...
  • Mother: *stops*...Your first words!
  • Baby: B-B...
  • Mother: C'mon sweetie, you c--
  • Baby: BE QUIET TIFFANY
  • Mother: W-...W-
  • Baby: NEVER IN MY LIFE HAVE I YELLED AT A GIRL LIKE THIS I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU HOW DARE YOU
  • Mother: I-I--
  • Baby: YOU DONT KNOW WHERE THE HELL I COME FROM YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH BUT I AM NOT A VICTIM, I GROW FROM IT AND I LEARN
  • Mother: ...
  • Baby: TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF
7,841 plays

unicornchiz99:

I was only 9 years old
I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies 
I pray to shriek every night before bed, thanking him for the life I’ve been given
”Shrek is love” I say. “Shrek is life”
My dad hears me and calls me a phaggot
I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Shrek 
I called him a kunt
He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
I’m crying now, and my face hurts
I lay in bed and it’s really cold
A warmth is moving towards me 
I feel something touch me
It’s Shrek
I am so happy
He whispers in to ear “this is my swamp”
He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands and puts me on my knees
I’m ready
I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek
He penetrates my butt hole
It hurts so much but I do it for Shrek 
I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
I push against his force
I want to please Shrek
He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love
My dad walks in
Shrek looks him straight in the eyes and says. “Its all ogre now”
Shrek leaves through my window
Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

(Source: dead-mistakes, via brobruhs)

reblog if you’re online and follow back

undivid:

reblog and like and watch your follower count grow! and don’t forget to follow me!:)

(via undivid)

"You either want me, or you don’t. It’s as simple as that."

My feelings aren’t a game, so stop playing with them. (via skate-job)

(via dogsnoteatingdogs)

trust:

bongfucker:

trust:

compliment me

barbecue sauce

thanks

(Source: trust, via wakeywakeydickhead)

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